I Just Want to Fucking Die Today.

January 29, 2009

Older/Lamer

Filed under: 1 — Alex @ 8:46 pm
Tags: ,

Today is Constitution Day in Gibraltar. Also, it is my birthday.

JANUARY 29TH

Events

904 – Sergius III comes out of retirement to take over the papacy from the deposed antipope Christopher.

1834 – US President Andrew Jackson orders first use of federal soldiers to suppress a labor dispute.

1845 – “The Raven” by Edgar Allan Poe is published in the New York Evening Mirror.

1861 – Kansas is admitted as the 34th U.S. state.

1863 – Bear River Massacre.

1886 – Karl Benz patents the first successful gasoline-driven automobile.

1940 – Three trains on the Sakurajima Line, in Osaka, Japan, crash and explode while approaching Ajikawaguchi station. 181 people are killed.

1944 – World War II: Approximately 38 men, women, and children die in the Koniuchy massacre in Poland.

2002 – In his State of the Union Address, United States President George W. Bush describes “regimes that sponsor terror” as an Axis of Evil, in which he includes Iraq, Iran and North Korea.

 

Births

1737 – Thomas Paine, English-born American patriot (d. 1809)

1754 – Moses Cleaveland, founder of Cleveland (d. 1806)

1843 – William McKinley, 25th President of the United States (d. 1901)

1860 – Anton Chekhov, Russian writer (d. 1904)

1874 – John D. Rockefeller Jr., American entrepreneur (d. 1960)

1880 – W.C. Fields, American actor (d. 1946)

1891 – R. Norris Williams, American survivor of the RMS Titanic sinking ( d. 1968 )

1922 – Gerda Steinhoff, Nazi concetration camp supervisor (d. 1946)

1930 – Derek Bailey, English guitar virtuoso (d. 2005)

1936 – James Jamerson, American bass guitarist for Motown Records (d. 1983)

1940 – Kunimitsu Takahashi, Japanese motorcycle racer and racing driver

1942 – Claudine Longet, French singer, dancer and convicted murderer

1944 – Andrew Loog Oldham, English rock and roll producer

1945 – Tom Selleck, American actor

1952 – Tommy Ramone, Hungarian-born musician and record producer (The Ramones)

1954 – Richard Manitoba, American singer (The Dictators and MC5)

1954 – Oprah Winfrey, American talk show host and actress

1960 – Gia Carangi, American model (d. 1986)

1960 – Greg Louganis, American diver

 

Deaths

1678 – Jeronimo Lobo, Portuguese Jesuit missionary (b. 1593)

1963 – Robert Frost, American poet (b. 1874)

1964 – Alan Ladd, American actor (b. 1913)

1969 – Allen Dulles, American CIA director (b. 1893)

1977 – Freddie Prinze, American actor and comedian (b. 1954)

1986 – Leif Erickson, American actor (b. 1911)

2002 – Dick “Night Train” Lane, American football player ( b. 1928 )

January 16, 2009

Die Painfully.

Filed under: Bullshit. — Alex @ 5:01 pm
Tags: , , ,
Bedagg put this up first. Then Killah Cam. Then McAwesome. I think it’s my solemn & sworn internet duty to follow suit. I present to you, my two and a half readers, my life according to my shuffled music.

1. What do your friends think of you?
“I Don’t Want to Be Alone” by Billy Joel.
My friends know me well, apparently.

2. If someone says, “Is this okay?” You say?
“Pick My Gun Up [Skit]” by R.A. the Rugged Man.
If you’ve heard this track from R.A.’s 2004 album “Die, Rugged Man, Die,” you’ll know it’s especially fitting.
 
3. How would you describe yourself?
“Censored” by Agnostic Front.
The Man is tryin’ to keep me quiet and docile, BUT I WON’T BE SILENCED.
 
4. What do you like for in a guy/girl?
“Everything Louder Than Everything Else” by Meat Loaf.
That’s my B. I don’t know anybody else who can make causing a scene in public an endearing trait.
 
5. How do you feel today?
“Drown in my Own Tears” by Ray Charles.
More like “How do you feel EVERYday! Ha Ha Ha! (Seriously, though.) Also: Wow, iPod. Way to put salt in the wound, huh?
 
6. What is your life’s purpose?
“Dry Clean Only” by Mitch Hedberg.
It’s the only thing that matters.
 
7. What is your motto?
“I Will Dare” by the Replacements.
My motto was written by a group of self-sabotaging, degenerate alcoholics. That fits.
 
8. What do you think about very often?
“Alone” by Sick of It All.
iPod is just twistin’ that knife.
 
9. What is 2 + 2?
“City Under Siege” by the Geto Boys.
I don’t get this question, but that doesn’t matter. The Geto Boys rule.
 
10. What do you think of your best friend?
“Something Wicked” by 2Pac.
THUG LIFE.

11. What do you think of the person you like?
“Something Beyond” by Bl’ast!.
B is from space, I guess?
 
12. What is your life story?
“Cool Confusion” by the Clash.
That about sums it up.
 
13. What do you want to be when you grow up?
The Day the Niggaz Took Over by Dr. Dre
BEST ANSWER EVER.
 
14. What do you think of when you see the person you like?
“Rose of my Heart” by Johnny Cash.
Awwwww.
 
15. What will you dance to at your wedding?
“Ride Your Pony” by the Fleshtones.
Good pick, iPod. Well played.
 
16. What will they play at your funeral?
“9th & Hennepin” by Tom Waits
I’m going to have the most unsettling funeral ever.
 
17. What is your hobby/interest?
Boomboxes and Dictionaries by the Gaslight Anthem.
HELL YEAH.
 
18. What is your biggest fear?
“It’s Not Funny Anymore” by Hüsker Dü.
Everything funny forever.

19. What is your biggest secret?
“Product of my Environment” by the Circle Jerks.
Not much of a secret, is it?
 
20. What do you think of your friends?
“Le nul parfait” by Morbid Fiesta.
Ha Ha Harsh! Seriously, though; I love you guys. No, really.
 
21. What will you post this as?
“Die Painfully” by Witches With Dicks.
You’re right! I will!

January 14, 2009

J’ai pas l’impression d’en demander trop.

Filed under: 1 — Alex @ 8:44 pm
Tags: , , ,
I REALLY DONT.

I REALLY DON'T.

 

 

All I want is just one good day. Not a superb day, not a lucky day. I don’t want to win the lottery or anything. I just want one good day. One dy without setbacks or things that send me into a panic. One day of not feeling nauseous and tired and heavy all day. I’m so tired.

January 12, 2009

Treatment Bound

Filed under: 1 — Alex @ 7:09 pm
Tags: , , ,

I really thought my friends knew me well enough to know that I’d never have and never will do something to intentionally fuck someone over. Am I just a shittier dude than I thought I was? I hope not. I don’t think I could stand living as a shitty dude.

I am Going to Make It Through This Year If It Kills Me.

Filed under: 1 — Alex @ 4:26 am
Tags: , ,

If it’s any consolation, I’m just as sick of my shit as you are. I’m tired of fucking up. I’m tired of disappointing. I’m tired of living paycheck to paycheck. I’m tired of misery.

I never make New Years resolutions. But I’ve got this girl, see. And she means the world to me. I’ve reached a point where I can clearly see a grown-up future for myself that includes her. Live like regular folks, you know? House, marriage, kids, porch, job. I figured it’s about time I establish some set goals for myself, ya dig?

1) This is officially the year of living frugally. No more spending my cash on bulllshit. No more eating out all the time. I want to have some savings in my savings account for once.

2) Hang out with my mom more. My mom kinda rules.

3) Stop being nice all the goddamn time. A little bit more taking what I want, a little bit more stepping on toes and not giving a shit.

That’s it. Go home.

January 3, 2009

I Got in a Lot of Trouble in the Last Ten Years.

Filed under: Bullshit. — Alex @ 2:09 pm

“Their songs are about struggling with being a shitty boyfriend[...]They’re about fucking up, over and over, and wondering if you’re learning to get better or simply eroding your ability to ever change.”

– Jason Heller

I listen to Off With Their Heads because I can’t properly articulate how disgusted and disappointed with myself and what I’ve made of my life. They write the songs about self-loathing and depression that I could never write myself. I’m glad they’re around, because if I didn’t have something like them I’d have choked to death on all these shitty feelings long ago.

I tried to plan a surprise party for B, but it got ruined within 12 hours. Thanks, world.

December 31, 2008

All My Friends Leave Home.

Filed under: Bullshit. — Alex @ 6:29 am
Tags: , ,

It’s starting to get to me.

December 22, 2008

Hello, Cruel World!

Filed under: Bullshit. — Alex @ 9:13 pm

Blogs are fucking stupid. Naturally, I have one now.

January 22, 2008

OTTAWA, ONTARIO

Filed under: 1 — Alex @ 3:06 pm

HEY!

HEY, OTTAWA!

IT’S ME, ALEX!

My band is hitting Ottawa this coming Thursday, January 24th. We’ll be playing over at Dishouse (454 Gladstone Ave). Come say hi!

January 8, 2008

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Filed under: 1 — Alex @ 1:03 pm

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